by Shilanda Woolridge

Resistance to doing what we know must be done is a derivative of fear. Fear is a tool of the ego. Fear, cleverly disguised as resistance, supports unwillingness. We are unwilling to be wrong, to look or sound stupid, to be challenged or defeated.
-- Iyanla Vanzant, One Day My Soul Just Opened Up

Everybody procrastinates. Even though punctuality is revered in our culture it seems natural to be late. We saunter in late to work, church, meetings, and parties. If you go to any college campus around finals time, you'll find students with coffee IVs in their arms trying to cram a semester's worth of material in a matter of days. We giggle and share war stories about the crusty dishes piled in the sink or the smelly pile of laundry that we ignore until we're down to our last pair of underwear. All of this is perfectly understandable. Most people avoid performing tasks they don't feel like doing. But it's a whole different ball game when one avoids the tasks they actually want to do.

Does this scenario sound familiar to you? It starts out the same every time -- you find yourself interested in something and go after it gung-ho. Time passes and the deadline looms in the horizon. More time passes and the deadline creeps closer, and though it's time to take action, nothing happens, until in a fit of passion you complete the task. Once it's finished it's hard to receive any satisfaction from it because of the manner in which it was done. Then comes the stressing and second guessing, as you wonder "Did I do a crappy job?" or lament "Damn... I could've done better if I had given myself more time." You tell yourself that next time it will be different, I'll start earlier next time. Then the same thing happens again and again. The frame of reference here will be creative people and their artistic pursuits, but procrastination may plague you regardless of where your interests lie. Take a walk through any self-help section in a bookstore and you'll find dozens of books about improving scheduling and time management, getting "unstuck," becoming an effective person, and going after your dreams. Even though they may not use the P-word, they are all tackling the same issue.

I'll admit I have a bad habit of procrastinating. Once I've gotten started everything is fine. If the task is a creative one, then I find myself engrossed and enjoying the work; more than once I've worked in excess of twelve hours straight on various creative projects. It's baffling how a person who has the ability to work hard has so much trouble getting started. I have numerous friends and co-workers who conduct themselves in the same manner. During a conversation on leading a productive life a friend said "I've always done things this way. Yeah, it may get a little stressful at times but it always works out OK in the end."

Apparently she's not the only one who feels this way. In certain segments of Austin we have a "Slacker Culture"; and I've met quite a few slackers in my seven years of living here. One of the things that I've noticed is that most of these so-called slackers were ambitious big-talkers with even bigger dreams. If they weren't in a band, they were aspiring filmmakers who were penning their next script or preparing to shoot their first small feature. Time passes, you run into the same folks and they're still talking and have nothing to show for it. More time passes and they're still working on the same project or talking about new ones with the incomplete projects long forgotten. So why aren't these people with the big ideas accomplishing anything? Granted, there are all sorts of circumstances that throw a monkey wrench into the gears of life. Are they scared? Afraid of what will happen if they don't succeed? Perhaps they're more afraid of what will happen if they do.

I've chatted with other creative folks who are struggling with blocks to their productivity. Sometimes I think the main problem is a mix of performance anxiety and perfectionism. We're imperfect perfectionists, we want to do things perfectly the first time every time. No one wants to make any mistakes -- for some reason making a mistake can feel like a character flaw. You can't learn unless you make some mistakes. It's impossible to appreciate where you've come from if the ride has been smooth the whole time, so mistakes are an important part of the process. So then why do we avoid them so darn much? Sometimes the problem is that we don't have the skills to implement the ideas we have. You can't walk until you crawl, but some of us decide that we'd rather sit on our rump than scoot across the floor until our legs are ready to carry us. In a society built on instant gratification, we want it NOW!

Talent is a major component of success, but even more important are blood, sweat, and tears. Talented artists who sit on their hands aren't going to amount to much. In order to make a living as a creative person, you have to be on top of things 24-7. Hemming and hawing aren't going to get a habitual procrastinator where they want to be. So the first question they have to ask themselves is "Am I really serious about this?" If you are serious then get ready to do some hard work. There are no quick answers here, only questions. It takes time to develop self-sabotaging habits, and it takes time to break them. You may have to solicit the help of a therapist or support group to discover why you behave the way you do. The first step is to know why, and then turn things around. Everybody has different reasons for being stuck, but there are two myths that ALL procrastinators have to challenge:

1. I DON'T FEEL LIKE IT or I'LL DO IT WHEN I FEEL LIKE IT You don't really have to feel like doing anything to get it done. Think back to childhood, did you ever feel like making your bed...but it got done didn't it?
   
2. I GET BETTER IDEAS/FEEL MORE CREATIVE AT THE LAST MINUTE This is impossible to gauge because at the last minute you really don't have a choice, it's either publish or perish.
   

On a serious note, if you find yourself incapable of accomplishing anything to the point that you're not functioning at all you might be suffering from clinical depression. Sleeping excessively or not at all, feelings of sadness or worthlessness, and loss of interest in things you care about are all symptoms. The effects of depression can be curtailed with a combination of therapy and medication, if this sounds like you then get online and check out depression.com or Depression Central for some self-test and referral information.

Everybody has a God-given talent, a gift that is uniquely yours. Everyone has the ability to make a contribution. So what's yours? Are you sitting on an atom bomb of an idea? It won't blow up unless you light the fuse. It would be truly gauche to end on a commercial note, but I'm afraid that I'm gonna have to go there. The old Nike slogan "Just Do It" is a powerful one because that's all you can do. Find out what's holding you back, conquer it, and just do it (today, not tomorrow).